By Rodetta Cook

Rodetta Cook has been a pastor’s wife for over 40 years. She and her husband, Ron, have actively served the Lord together in ministry during the entire time and are co-founders of Care for Pastors. She understands the expectations, loneliness and how hard it is to find balance in ministry as a pastor’s wife. Rodetta also leads the pastor’s wives initiative at Care for Pastors called The Confidante and ministers to hundreds of wives each week. She strives to share blogs with other pastors’ wives that will help them in their ministry walk.

    The Disgrace of Infertility

    Monday, May 02, 2016

    As we are approaching Mother’s Day, I pray you will enjoy your day honoring your Mother whether she is still living or not, and you will enjoy allowing your children to honor you.

    If you have not been blessed with children, then I would encourage you to allow those spiritual children that God has put in your life to honor you.

    Mother’s Day used to be very emotional and difficult for me because we do not have children, until I realized God had a different plan for me. Although I don’t have any biological children, He has put hundreds of spiritual children in my life that I have been able to mentor and love as if they were my own.

    Wherever God has you, I pray you will be sensitive to others that may not be in the same place as you. There may be some ladies in your life that were not fortunate enough to have a good relationship with their Mother and Mother’s Day may be very difficult for them, so be sensitive to that and encourage them and love on them.

    For those that don’t have children and may dread Mother’s Day, encourage them because God uses them in ways they may not even be aware.

    I understand the hurtful things people say like, “Isn’t it time you two start having children?” Or “You know you’re not getting any younger. Don’t you think it’s time to have children?” There were times I wanted to just shout it from the rooftop, “This is out of my control.” But I would just smile and say, “It’s all in God’s timing.” We went through all the infertility tests and that roller coaster ride for a few years all for the doctors to tell us there was no medical reason we could not get pregnant. Therefore, we decided to leave it in God’s hands and if this was what He had for our lives, He would allow it and if not we would be okay with that. It was that following year that I was diagnosed with cancer and went through treatments and realized how difficult that would have been had we had small children. God has done a work in my life through the years of healing that void and showing me ways that I have been able to minister that I could not have had I had my desires. So I spoil everyone else’s children and send them home.

    There is an article I would like to share with you about infertility and pray it will speak to all of us whatever stage God has us in. We need to learn to be sensitive to others and to understand what they may be going through. Please go to and read the article entitled “The Disgrace of Infertility.”

    Don’t allow circumstances to make you feel alone or that God has forsaken you. He hasn’t. He has different plans for each of you.

    I pray you enjoy your Mother’s Day and truly allow God to use you in your stage of life!



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