By Rodetta Cook

Rodetta Cook has been a pastor’s wife for over 40 years. She and her husband, Ron, have actively served the Lord together in ministry during the entire time and are co-founders of Care for Pastors. She understands the expectations, loneliness and how hard it is to find balance in ministry as a pastor’s wife. Rodetta also leads the pastor’s wives initiative at Care for Pastors called The Confidante and ministers to hundreds of wives each week. She strives to share blogs with other pastors’ wives that will help them in their ministry walk.

    Raising Men Not Boys

    Monday, August 29, 2022

    By Christy K.

    This month’s resource, Raising Men, Not Boys, is an encouraging book that not only addresses important foundational principles and goals for raising boys to grow up to be self-controlled, respectable young men, but also provides practical advice to help parents think through how they might accomplish these ends.

    I read this book with two moms of boys; one has a young teen and an older teen, while the other has boys under age 10. We read a chapter and then met over Facebook video chat to discuss the chapter and our insights from it.  This was a great way to get together weekly, encourage one another, learn useful and thought-provoking methods of raising boys, and pray for each other and our families.

    The author discusses the state of our culture – how men are portrayed in movies and television to be doofuses, unable to contribute intelligently to the raising of the children and hardly partners with their wives. This obviously is not what God intended for the family, so the discussion follows about God’s plan for families from the Genesis story, and how marriage is a reflection of Christ and the church.

    As I’ve shared in the past, I always look at the Table of Contents to determine the value of the book for me, so here’s what you have to look forward to:

    1. Envision a Man’s Future Every Day
    2. Set His Spiritual Trajectory
    3. A Home That Builds Godly Men
    4. Quell the Rebellion of His Sinful Heart
    5. Make Him Sweat Every Day
    6. Instill a Manly Work Ethic
    7. Help Him Foster Dominion Over His Wallet
    8. Raising Men in a World Half-Full of Women
    9. Prepare Him to Face the World
    10. A Righteous Man’s Fun and Games
    11. Wisdom to Navigate the Teen Years

    I think it was very helpful to read this with a mom with older boys and one with younger boys because the mom with older boys was a great help and advisor. Both moms often mentioned how they encouraged their husbands to read certain sections with them, or specific items in the book to help them with their boys that encouraged them to be united in their parenting. The author took us back to scripture to solidify his statements, which I think is paramount – it’s God’s opinion that matters most!

    Even though my husband and I raised 4 girls, it was refreshing to read this book with these boy moms to help them see God’s plan for their sons – to be godly, independent young men who love, follow, and serve Christ.



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