By Rodetta Cook

Rodetta Cook has been a pastor’s wife for over 40 years. She and her husband, Ron, have actively served the Lord together in ministry during the entire time and are co-founders of Care for Pastors. She understands the expectations, loneliness and how hard it is to find balance in ministry as a pastor’s wife. Rodetta also leads the pastor’s wives initiative at Care for Pastors called The Confidante and ministers to hundreds of wives each week. She strives to share blogs with other pastors’ wives that will help them in their ministry walk.

    Learning to Be Patient with Others

    Monday, November 03, 2014

    As you begin a new week I wanted to share a story that I know we as pastors’ wives can all relate to when we look at the fact that it is easier to see other’s faults quicker than our own. It is a story from a book Mondays with My Old Pastor.

    A man called the family doctor. “Doctor, come at once. I’m worried about my wife.”

                “What’s wrong with her?

                  “She’s going deaf.”

                “What do you mean she’s going deaf?”

                “She really is. I need you to come see her.”

    “Look,” the doctor argued. “Generally, deafness is not something that comes on so fast or severe, so bring her to the office on Monday, and I will see her.”

                “But do you think we can wait until next Monday.”

                “What makes you think she can’t hear?”

                “Well…because when I call her she doesn’t answer.”

    “Look, it can be a simple thing, like an earplug in the ear. First of all, let’s do something. We’re going to determine the level of deafness your wife has. Where are you?”

                “In the bedroom.”

                “And where is she?”

                “In the living room.”

                “Great, so call her from there.”

                “Carmen! No, she doesn’t hear me.”

                “Okay, go closer to the bedroom door and shout from the hallway.”

                ‘Carmen! No, not even now.”

    “Don’t be too concerned. Go get the cordless phone and go into the hallway and call her to see if she hears you.”

    “Carmen! Carmen! Carmen! Nothing’s happening. I’m in front of the door of the living room and I see her. She has her back turned to me and is reading a book, but she doesn’t hear me. Carmen! Nothing’s happening.”

                “Go closer.”

    The man entered the room, walked up to Carmen, put his hand on her shoulder, and shouted in her ear: “Carmen!”

    The wife, furious, turned around and said to him: “What do you want? What do you want? What do you wannnnt? You’ve called me about ten times, and ten times I’ve answered you. ‘What do you want?’ You’re getting deafer by the day. I don’t know why you don’t go to the doctor.”

    Every time you see something that bothers you in another person, remember that what you see, at the very least, is something you could have the same issue with as well.

    Let’s learn to be patient with others.


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