Have you ever had your trust broken? Do you have trouble trusting? Do you ever feel like people aren’t being honest? Do you feel betrayed and that you will never trust again?
I could ask so many questions about broken trust and you could probably answer yes to every one of those questions. Unfortunately, it doesn’t take long in ministry for our trust to be broken or for us to not feel safe with some people. Probably one of the hardest things in ministry to do is to learn to trust again.
When we went through what we called a “Hostile Take-over Attempt” about seven years into our church plant, some of what we thought were our closest friends betrayed us and spread rumors to so many people. Thankfully, we didn’t just go through it, but we grew through it; however, I didn’t know if I could fully trust church members again. Betrayal is one of the most hurtful things in ministry and one of the hardest things to move past.
I wish I had had this book I Want to Trust You, But I Don’t by Lysa TerKeurst back then, as I worked through those feelings of betrayal. Thankfully, God helped me learn to trust again, but I know this book and the study that goes with it would have been very helpful. I would highly recommend it to every pastor’s wife. Even if your trust hasn’t been broken, it is a helpful resource.
Here is what Lysa says on the back cover of the book:
Having your trust broken can be life altering, but it doesn’t have to be life ruining.
Broken trust complicates every bit of the parts of love that should be comforting. Maybe a friend constantly lets you down. A family member betrayed you. A spouse cheated on you. A leader deceived you. You’re exhausted by other people’s choices and are starting to question:
- How do I know if it’s wise to trust that person again?
- Will I be able to discern if someone is telling me the truth?
- Is it possible to still trust God when I’m afraid of what He will allow next?
I understand this kind of deep pain and the skepticism that makes us wary. But I’ve also learned so much that I want to invite you into my journey and share the scriptural wisdom I’ve gained, the tools that have been helpful, the setbacks, the victories, and the deepest wrestling I’ve ever done with questions about myself, others, and even God.
I get the fear of trying again. But I’ve come to know the joy of moving into new seasons and finally feeling safe enough to connect deeply with people who are trustworthy. Through these pages, you can find the confidence and courage to walk into a future full of possibilities. I promise you the risks are worth taking. — Lysa
I believe this is a book we all need to read and maybe re-read. As you well know, broken trust isn’t always from ministry, many times as Lysa says, it is family, spouse or a trusted friend. Betrayal is betrayal, no matter where it comes from, and we all need to work through it and learn to trust again. I believe this book will help you as you ask the Lord to work in your heart and help you to trust again.
